B and I got to the RE’s office at 9am for our appointment. They were a bit backed up so we didn’t get in until 9:30am. It was strange sitting in the waiting room with others. Before today I had always assumed those in the waiting room with me were in the same place as I was. It never occurred to me that any of them might have been going in for an ultrasound b/c they were pregnant. I mean it’s really pretty silly, but that is just the place I was in so I guess I assumed they were in it with me. Today I had a tinge of guilt, but I also knew that there were a bunch of BFP’s for this past IVF cycle. When I spoke to the nurse about our doubling beta level she was flustering a little bit to find when my ultrasound appointment would be. She said she couldn’t remember off the top of her head b/c they had so many BFP’s this cycle. I was hoping that’s why the others in the waiting room were there, but I also kept myself in check so that I didn’t inadvertently seem too happy while we were waiting or when we left.
We were in the room with A our favorite ultrasound tech and K one of our favorite nurses. We got started right away and the first thing A said was, “How do you both feel about twins?!!!!” and turned the monitor so we could see. B and I both had huge smiles on our faces and we both even giggled a little bit. We were relieved, shocked, happy, excited, terrified, nervous, you name it, we felt it. But most of all we are happy. Then A turned the monitor back and took a closer look. She named them A and B. A is measuring at 6w3d with a HB of 128 and B is measuring a couple days behind at 6w0d with a HB of 122. My ovaries are still HUGE, but not so huge that there was any concern. Everything looked good to A so we were SO relieved! K scheduled us for 1 more ultrasound in 2 weeks (12/28) and gave us a referral to an OB in the same hospital. The OB is actually on the 4th floor of the same building and he did a rotation in the IVF unit. This was what sold me on him. K gave several recommendations, but I asked her for someone who would be especially sensitive to what we went through and informed about IVF (partly so I don’t feel like I need to teach my doctor about how we got here). I made our first appointment with him for 1/3/13 (I will be 9 weeks, 3 days). I asked K when it would be okay to tell people and she said after the 8 week ultrasound as long as everything looked good. She said that 6-8 weeks is the most critical time period. She also said there is a chance that we could have a vanishing twin, but there was nothing to suggest that from what A saw on the ultrasound.
K also tracked down our RE so she could congratulate us and we could thank her. She isn’t scheduled to work on the 28th when we go back so she wanted to see us today. I liked her, but I honestly didn’t have much contact with her. I spent most of my time with the nurses and ultrasound tech. E, who is our other favorite nurse was not there today, but K said she would make sure E would be there on the 28th b/c she is so happy for us! That was so nice to hear. I truly feel lucky that we were not just physically cared for by our team, but emotionally cared for as well. I know they wanted us to become pregnant just as much as we wanted it. I don’t feel like we are out of the woods yet, but I do feel like we’ve hit the next milestone and I can breathe a bit easier now.
We still haven’t told anyone. We wanted to tell my parents today on facetime, but my mom was in the car on her way out to dinner with friends when we called. We will try to get them both together again tomorrow afternoon. We want to see their faces when we tell them. We also want to be very clear that we are not ready to tell anyone else and expect them to keep it a secret. I trust my dad completely with this, but my mom is another story. I don’t know if anyone remembers a post I wrote a couple of months ago, but my mom told my brother that B and I are infertile. I was furious with her for doing that, but she still feels he had a right to know. We want to make it clear to her that we told her b/c we want her to be a part of it, but we expect her to keep things quiet until we are in the “safe” zone. This will be 12 weeks for us as long as there are no complications at that point.
When we decided to transfer 2 non-top quality embryo’s I was terrified because I truly did not want twins. Once we talked about it more, I felt it was the right decision medically as we already had 2 failed cycles with single top quality embryos. Over the past couple of weeks, I have been wondering what this first ultrasound would be like. How would I feel if there were no heartbeats?…heartbroken, defeated, helpless, to name a few How would I feel if there was only 1 heartbeat?…and to my surprise, my initial thought was happy of course, but also a bit sad and disappointed. How would I feel if there were two heartbeats?…thrilled, happy, terrified, but mostly happy. Today I truly expected to only see 1 heartbeat because my beta levels weren’t super high (245 and 2 days later 491). I can truly say that I am happy at the thought of twins. I know things might not say this way, but for right now B and I are feeling like the luckiest couple in the world.