One to Freeze

Yup, I got the call today.  One of the two embryos that were looking good at day 3 made it to blast stage.  I asked her what grade it was and she told me that they don’t grade them at the blast stage b/c if the embryo makes it to blast stage they are all considered rock stars (my words not hers…haha).  It feels good to hear the news.  Since work started this week I have been a completely overwhelmed stress ball that it didn’t even occur to me that I would be getting a call to find out if any were able to be frozen.  And even when I saw it was the nurse calling, my thought was she was just calling to check in and remind me of the date of my 1st beta.  It was one of my favorite nurses and she got right to the point and sounded very positive and said they are always there if I need to call between now and beta day.  She also said the next time she calls, she hopes she has good news for me :)  I’m feeling good about having a frozen embryo.  I feel only good things can come from having it.  Worst case (which isn’t really terrible) is that this cycle fails and we do a FET.  Best case is that we get pregnant this cycle and have a possible future sibling for our current cute little embryo without having to do a full cycle in the future.  I prefer to go with option two, but I know with time I could see option one puts us in a better place than if we didn’t have any frozen.

Well I am completely mentally , physically, psychologically, and emotionally drained this week.  Waking up at 5:30am every morning and working non-stop all day while feeling the stress and anxiety of the amount of stuff I have to do in not enough time is wearing on me.  Not to mention the completely draining emotional aspect of the TWW.  Tomorrow marks 1 week, so 1 week left to go.  We have another wedding (well just a casual reception as they already got married) on Saturday.  Thank goodness Monday is a holiday.  I will end up doing a lot of work, but at least I will get to sleep in and relax for a little bit.  Then I have a short week because I also took next Friday off since I’m going in for my beta.  I decided whether it was good or bad news, I didn’t want to receive it while at work.  B will also be home on Friday (although he’ll be sleeping during the day) so hopefully they call at a time when we can hear the news together.

Overall, I’m still feeling positive and feeling pretty good (except for the extreme tiredness).



Transfer was Perfect!

That is what the nurse, ultrasound tech, and my RE all said after the procedure.  There was also a med student in the room observing, which was actually cool b/c I feel like I got to hear more information as each person was explaining everything to her in more detail as they went along.  Again, all women in the room!  The rolled me into the OR and adjusted the table to put my legs in the stirrups.  The lab tech came in and went over my “fertilization report card” (her words not mine).  It said I had 5 eggs retrieved, 5 fertilized, 4 made it to day 3 and they would be transferring 1 top grade 8-cell (perfect little embryo…my words…haha).  The ultrasound tech took a look at my bladder to see how full it was, to which she replied, “it couldn’t be anymore perfect”.  Then the RE put the catheter into my cervix and we watched the embryo go up the catheter and get dropped into the center of my uterus.  It was SO amazing to see!  It was this tiny white ball floating right there on the screen.  The ultrasound tech printed a picture for us to take home!  It was a really great experience all around.  Everyone was super nice and very positive, while still sounding realistic about everything.  The only discomfort I had was having such a full bladder.  About 10 minutes after the transfer I was able to relieve myself and it made such a difference!  I am feeling great right now and am so thankful to have a picture of our cute little embie to look at :)  I uploaded the pic so you all could see!  It’s the white dot in the center of the picture with a circle drawn around it.

Day 3 Transfer Today

Yup, I got the call this morning.  We will be doing a 3 day transfer today at 11:20am.  We’ve decided to transfer 1 top grade quality embryo.  Out of the 5 fertilized eggs, 2 became top grade quality embryos, 1 became a high grade quality embryo, 1 stopped growing, and 1 had fragmented (not completely sure what that means).  The lab tech asked me if we wanted to transfer 1 or 2 because that is what we had written on the initial consent form.  She said if we transferred 1 of the top grade embryos, we would have a little over a 40% chance of becoming pregnant.  If we transferred both of the top grade embryos, we would have a little over a 50% chance of becoming pregnant.  However, if we transferred 2, we would also have a 50% chance of having twins.  B and I decided to go with 1 embryo.  When I called the lab tech back to tell her, she said that is what we like to hear and that their goal is achieve a successful singleton pregnancy.  I feel very confident in our decision.  If this cycle of IVF is unsuccessful, we would be more willing to transfer 2 embryos next time around, but for our first cycle we believe this is right for us.

Well wish us luck!  The waiting begins today…

And thank you very much for everyone’s support after the retrieval.  I am so comforted by all of your words.  You all rock!!!! :)

5 mature eggs and all 5 Fertilized!!!!

UPDATE:  So a bit about yesterday.  We were up at 6:30am to start packing up the coolers, dropping the puppy off at camp, and running a couple errands.  We had to be at our friends house to take the bus down at 10:30am.  Yes, this is an intense/nutty drinking crowd.  I was checking my phone continuously waiting to hear from the lab about my eggs and how fertilization went.  I survived the bus ride without any, why aren’t you drinking? questions.  Once tailgating was all set up, I was feeling okay…just drinking gatorade and water.  I started my estrogen patches (2 applied to my abdomen) and my progesterone suppositories (yuck!).  At first I felt slightly nauseous, but once we were there I felt fine.  I only had to deal with 1 obnoxious person trying to get me to eat pudding shots.  He made some stupid comment like, “Oh I guess congratulations are in order for B” when I refused.  I said no and then he said “Unless I can congratulate B, you have to have one”.  Oh very mature, apparently being pregnant is the only valid reason for refusing alcohol.  He wasn’t backing down, so I just took a spoon and shot in my hand and thought he would continue on, but he seemed to be waiting to see if I would eat/drink it.  So B took it back from me and gave it back and said she’s not having one in his I’m serious voice and that seemed to be enough for him to back off.  Luckily that was the only minor incident.

So I’m waiting the entire day to hear something from the lab and nothing.  We were about to walk into the concert around 5:15 and I got a call from an unknown cell number from another state.  I usually don’t answer unknown numbers, but I was waiting for a call so I just answered it.  It was the person from the lab.  Apparently she forgot to call all of us (there were 4 retrievals on Friday) and one of the other girls called the lab and asked why she hadn’t been called.  So the lab tech was extremely nice and apologetic for not calling sooner.  I was just happy to hear from her and hear that all 5 had fertilized!  She said to prepare for a 3 day transfer, so that is what we are doing.  We should hear from lab around 8:30am tomorrow morning with a definite time.  I’ve decided I’m fine with whatever day we transfer.  I’m just hoping for 1 top graded embryo to transfer :)

As for the concert, we had an amazing time!  It was the last show of the tour and they definitely had fun with it.  There was even a surprise appearance from Faith Hill to do a duet with her husband.  The crowd of 60,000 people was so loud that she couldn’t even hear herself sing and was so overwhelmed with emotion that she missed a few of her lines b/c she couldn’t catch her breath.  At the end of the song, once they finished strong together, they kissed and Tim lifted her off her feet.  It was so nice to be a part of that moment and see the love between two other people.  Of course I was almost brought to tears as I was during particularly emotional songs (happy or sad) b/c of where we are at.  It was such a small moment of the night, but it was an awesome memory to have made.  The bus ride home was a nightmare, but it did not ruin the night for us.  We will of course go back to see Kenny again next year :)

I don’t have much time to write now, but I wanted to pass along the good news.  I know how I get when I am waiting to hear news from the blogs I follow.  All 5 eggs fertilized and the lab technician was VERY pleased with the ICSI procedure!!! Woohoo!!!!  We will most likely do  a 3 day transfer (Monday) unless at least 4 of the 5 are all top quality.  The lab person that I spoke to said it was possible this could happen because of my age, but to plan on a 3 day transfer.

I will write more details later…we are enjoying our happy news for now :)

Retrieval Day was a Success!

First of all, I just want to thank all of you for being so supportive and sending positive thoughts my way!  I want to send a special shout out to the ladies that sent me supportive messages last night when I couldn’t sleep.  Amazingly enough, once I wrote that post last night, I went upstairs and fell right asleep so I didn’t read your posts until this morning.  However, they were very comforting and gave me positive things to think about during the drive in….so Stupid Stork, Battlefish, and JustCyclingAlong THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!  Your words came at a time when I need them the most! :)

The day started out well.  We were both up and about by 5:30am and arrived about 10 minutes early to our 6:30am appointment.  After pulling into the parking lot and picking a place to park, the attendant (an older man…maybe in his 60’s) told us to come park at the front spot and moved the cone that was blocking the space (so now the car was between the curb and another open space with a cone, which I assume is for other VIP patients like ourselves…haha).  He told us that we have a nice car (Chevy Tahoe…not like it’s a ferrari or anything) and he didn’t want to see it get hit.  He was very friendly and wished us luck going in.  It is a hospital, so it’s not like it’s IVF procedures only.  He was just being nice in general.  I felt like this was a sign that today would be a good day :)

We started out going over the consent for them to use our data in their Repository study.  Basically, we consented for them to replace our names with numbers and use our information to group with others to help them understand the IVF process even more.  Of course we want to give a very small contribution to the research of IVF to helpfully help those that will come along after us.  Then it was back to the nurses station where we met M who went over all our paperwork, put on my hospital bracelet and started my IV.  We were the first of 4 (yes 4!!!) retrievals today.  M started the IV in my left hand, but as she did it she heard something pop.  Apparently the IV was in, but my hand started to swell a bit, bruise a bit, and it wasn’t painful, but it was not completely comfortable.  After about 10 minutes went by (once the anesthesiologist went over everything and my RE came in to answer any questions) M decided to take out my IV and do it again in a different place.  I was very happy she suggested this as I was thinking about asking her.  She was very apologetic, but it really wasn’t a big deal.  It was uncomfortable, but not painful.  I was more focused on what might happen if the IV wasn’t completely okay and I wasn’t getting the meds properly.  So once the new one was in, I felt comfortable and confident.  I only teared up once while waiting…I just became overwhelmed, but was easily comforted by B.

Then I walked myself and my IV into the operating room.  This was slightly intimidating, but I did okay.  I remember feeling really happy because all of the people in the room were women and that made me feel safe…I think I’m just biased and believe women to be more competent than men.  I also saw this as a good sign.  I got myself situated on the table, laid down, made a comment about being thankful that the blankets they were laying on me were so warm, put on the oxygen mask, heard the anesthesiologist say that I might feel stinging when the meds went into my IV, but that she would put some numbing medicine in too so hopefully I wouldn’t feel it, and then I WAS OUT!  The next thing I know, I’m waking up back in the nurses station curtain with B.  It took me several seconds to realize where I was (I guess I thought I would still be in the operating room) and then was able to sit up and start talking to B.  Apparently the first thing I asked him was, “How was the Scrooge room”…it took me about a minute more to say what I actually meant, which was “How was the Splooge room”.  To which he quietly replied, “stop yelling splooge!!!…we are behind a curtain, people can hear you!”  hahaha!

Then M came back in and took out my IV.  She got me some cranberry juice and a few saltines.  I didn’t have any pain or discomfort at all and no nausea.  After about 10 more minutes of sitting up and talking to the nurse, a person from the lab came in and said that they retrieved 5 eggs.  She said they wouldn’t know if they are all mature until they did the ICSI procedure 4 hours later and that the nurse would call me tomorrow to let me know how many were mature and how many fertilized.  The nurse would also instruct me to start the prometrium suppositories and estrogen patches.  I am happy with the number 5…it is actually the number that B predicted before we even knew how many follicles there were.  I also looked up what numerology says about the number 5 and this is what it said, “5 is the most dynamic and energetic of the single digits!”  I’ll take it! :)

I was given 2 prescriptions when I left…Percocet for the pain over the next couple of days as needed and 2 pills of Valium – 1 to take 1 hour before the transfer and 1 to bring with me to the hospital.

Once we got home, I just laid on the couch and watched some TV while B made me breakfast.  I just did TV watching for the morning, had lunch and then got bored with TV.  B was tired so he also laid down on the couch to nap.  I was starting to feel a bit cramp and uncomfortable so I took 1/2 a Percocet and closed my eyes…I guess I was out for about an hour.  As of now, I’m feeling pretty good.  Overall I feel a bit weak, but good.  I’ve been able to eat normally and I have peed about 10x.  B went out on errands today and got something to make for dinner.  I think we’ll just watch a movie together after dinner and I’ll take another 1/2 pill of Percocet and call it a night.  We will be up fairly early tomorrow for the Brothers of the Sun Tour (Kenny Chesney and Tim McGraw) in Foxboro tomorrow night.  It will be a long day, but I’m really looking forward to it and feeling relieved that I am feeling so good.  Now I will just have to deal with the morons bugging me about not drinking….oh well!  I’m happy with how everything went and we will know how many eggs fertilized before our day begins so I will just hold onto the good news all day long! :)


The night before retrieval

Yes, it is 10 after 11pm and I cannot sleep.  I tried going to bed at 9:30pm, but got up around 10:30pm b/c I’m wide awake.  I will need to be up at 5:30am to shower before getting to the hospital at 6:30am for the retrieval (which will be at 7:30am).  I wish it was morning already and we could just get it started.  My mind is racing with all sorts of thoughts…mostly surrounding the anesthesia.  I have never been under before and am very anxious about what it will feel like.  I am not someone who likes to relinquish control (I’m sure the feeling is similar for all of you) and I don’t like that I will be unaware of what is happening to my body.  Not that I want to be awake for the procedure either, but the thought of something happening to me and not having any memory of it actually happening freaks me out.  Another thing that is freaking me out is the thought of waking up in the middle of the procedure.  I’m sure this will not happen, but the thought of it happening is still there regardless.  And on a very random note, my eyes are SO itchy!  I don’t know if I am having subtle allergy symptoms or what, but it’s driving me crazy!

What did you all do the night before your retrieval?  How did you mentally prepare yourself?  I’m guessing my anxiety is stemming mostly from the unknown.  It’s hard to prepare for something that you have never experienced.  While I was laying in bed, I was trying to picture how things would go, but I have very limited information to go on so I couldn’t really picture it.  Then I tried thinking baby thoughts.  I tried imagining finding out we were pregnant…where we would be, which nurse would give the news, how she would word the good news, etc.  I also tried picturing myself pregnant (unsuccessfully I might add) and going for a walk with B, C, and new baby.  I’m trying to focus my crazy on more positive thoughts, but it has just resulted in my mind spinning and spinning!

Wish me luck in getting to sleep tonight and making it through the procedure tomorrow without having to be strapped down in a straight jacket! :)  I will post an update tomorrow afternoon barring my being placed in the psych ward!!!!

I trigger tonight! Yikes!

So I got the call from the nurse.  I trigger tonight at 7:30pm and will have the retrieval at 7:30am on Friday.  We have to be there an hour early to talk with the anesthesiologist.  I’m a bit thrown from how quickly this is happening.  It’s actually here!  Wow!  I really don’t know what to say.  I have a whole lot of feelings all at once.  Excited, nervous, scared, worried, happy, anxious, etc.  I’m SO happy B will not have work and will be able to be home to take care of C and let me rest.  I’m not allowed to eat or drink anything after midnight.  The procedure will take approximately 30 minutes and the nurse told me to plan to be there about 1 hour to 1 1/2 hours afterwards.  The nurse didn’t say anything more about my # of follicles so I’m going to try and not focus on that.  I want to go into this with only positive thoughts.  Well wish me luck!

Also, I have a question for those who have done IVF.  If I have the retrieval on Friday, what day would be a 3-day transfer?  Sunday or Monday?  I don’t know if you count the retrieval day as day 1.