When will it feel safe to celebrate?

We got the call today that our 2nd beta level was 491.  Forty-eight hours prior it was 245, so it almost exactly doubled.  The nurse said they hope for it to double by the 2nd or 3rd day and was very happy it doubled in 2 days.  I will continue with my estrogen and proestrogen routine and will come in for a pregnancy ultrasound on December 14th, which is 4 weeks after transfer (so I will be 6 weeks, 4 days).  She also said she was sending me some early pregnancy information in the mail.  My beta doubled.  This is good news.  Why don’t I feel excited?  I definitely feel happy, but there is no excitement at all.  B and I have had very short conversations to the effect of…we will need to discuss childcare options or we will need to make a list of things we need.  We’ve been waiting to have these detailed conversations, but it just doesn’t feel right yet.  It doesn’t feel like we can count on the first two positive betas as an indication of pregnancy.  Will it feel real after the first ultrasound?  Will it feel real when we have our first appointment with an OB?  Btw we don’t have one yet, but the nurse said she could give us a couple names when we go in for the ultrasound.  She said OB’s will not schedule appointments with us until we have been let go from the RE anyway.

When a fertile goes in for a blood test to verify pregnancy, is she automatically asked to come back 2 days later to see if the beta level is rising?  Or is one positive number enough?

At 4 weeks, 3 days I no longer fit into my work pants.  My pants had been getting tighter all through the IVF process, but I could still get away with keeping the top button opened and just wearing a longer shirt to cover.  Thankfully, I did buy 1 new pair of work pants in a size 6 (my other pants are all size 4’s) with a gift card I got for my birthday (I know…not an exciting birthday purchase…work clothes AND going up a size!).  Sunday night, the night before we found out the first beta level, I literally had to take my yoga pants off to sleep b/c they were hurting my stomach too much.  That has gotten a bit better, but all week I have been feeling discomfort in my lower abdomen.  At first it was making me nervous that I had an ectopic, but it’s been more discomfort than pain and I haven’t had any other symptom.  I also read somewhere that you don’t feel symptoms of an ectopic until 7-8 weeks along…is that true?  Either way, as for right now, I have a very full feeling and almost feel like there is some weird movement…like stretching?  It’s hard to describe, but I’ve read other blogs that mention a stretching feeling at this point in time.  The other thing is that I am completely exhausted.  I think this is mostly from the stress of everything.

I just want to be able to have excited about being pregnant.  When will it feel safe to do so?  When will it feel like not only are we pregnant, but this is our take home baby?

ps- I started this post last night, but then fell asleep at 8:30pm, so I finished it up this morning.


3 thoughts on “When will it feel safe to celebrate?

  1. I wish I knew! I am going for my nt scan this week (12weeks) and I am still incredibly nervous. But it definitely goes down over time from that inital fear, and hopefully you will get to excited more quickly. Very happy for you and your good doubling beta!

  2. Yeah, I didn’t really start to feel ok until I was 35 weeks along. My daughter was born @ 37+3 so not much time to enjoy it. I didn’t start any baby stuff until I was past viability. Hell, I didn’t even tell people until I was 16 weeks & even then it was only a select few. Fingers crossed for you…keeping you in my thoughts and prayers! Hugs!

  3. In the UK for a fertile, they don’t always even do a blood test. The fact you have had a positive peestick is enough. I KNOW, how unbelievable is that.

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